She Came Out at 9. Why Her Brother’s Support Is the ‘Biggest Blessing’
She came out at 9 Why her – At the age of nine, Chazzie Grosshandler shared her truth with her family—she was transgender. This revelation, which reshaped her identity, was met with unwavering acceptance from her older brother Lev. Now in their early 20s, the siblings reflect on how their bond has evolved from playful childhood adventures to deep, meaningful conversations about life, ambition, and the unbreakable connection they share.
A Bond Forged in Play
Lev and Chazzie’s relationship began with simple joys: tea parties, imaginative games, and Lev’s habit of pushing Chazzie around the house in a basket to simulate flight. Their parents affectionately dubbed them “the blondies” for their shared golden hair, a nickname that still carries warmth in their memories. These early interactions laid the groundwork for a dynamic that has endured over the years, blending humor and empathy in equal measure.
From Childhood to Adulthood
As they’ve grown older, their relationship has deepened. Chazzie, now 20, and Lev, 26, navigate the complexities of adult life—college decisions, career aspirations, and the subtle shifts in how they see each other. For Chazzie, Lev’s consistent support has been transformative. “He is so supportive and understanding,” she said. “When I was trying to figure out who I was, he never questioned anything. He just embraced it.”
“He would make me feel so seen and affirmed,” Chazzie added. “His allyship doesn’t go unnoticed because he’s vocal about his support, immersing himself in the trans community to learn and grow.”
The Power of Sibling Acceptance
Studies reveal that LGBTQ+ youth who experience high levels of family acceptance tend to thrive in areas like self-esteem and social well-being. The Trevor Project’s research highlights that sibling relationships can be a vital source of support, often overlooked in discussions about LGBTQ+ mental health. For Chazzie, Lev’s role as an ally has been pivotal, not just in affirming her identity but in bridging gaps between her family and the broader community.
Lev’s perspective is equally revealing. “I was just very grateful that Chazzie felt comfortable enough to share her true self with us,” he said. “That comfort has created a space where we can talk openly about who we are, without fear or hesitation.”
Shared Experiences and Mutual Understanding
While Chazzie’s parents were also quick to accept her identity, she credits her siblings with a unique kind of connection. “Now that we’re all in our 20s, we’re able to understand each other a little more,” she noted. This shared journey through adolescence has allowed them to relate on deeper levels, from navigating job markets to facing life’s inevitable ups and downs.
Lev agrees that time has strengthened their bond. “When Chazzie came out in fourth grade, I was a high school freshman,” he said. “We felt like we were on different paths. But now, having gone through middle school, high school, and college together, we’ve built a foundation of trust and empathy.”
“I think this is the same thing with all siblings,” Lev continued. “As you grow older, you have the chance to become closer because you start sharing more experiences. It’s like we’ve grown into each other’s lives, rather than just existing in parallel.”
Embracing Authenticity
Chazzie’s journey as a trans youth has not only influenced her personal growth but also inspired her family to take action. Her story is the catalyst for The GenderCool project, a non-profit initiative aimed at uplifting trans and nonbinary youth by showcasing their diverse experiences. “We share stories of who these people are—actors, musicians, photographers, scholars, writers,” Lev explained. “It humanizes them because they are humans. It lets people realize, wow, these are just normal people, like I have in my life, and I should affirm them for who they are.”
Lev’s insight underscores a broader truth: sibling relationships can be a powerful tool for fostering acceptance. “What’s more interesting about who we are,” he said, “is our character, our interests, and our goals. Those things are all much more descriptive of who we are as individuals.”
The Ripple Effect of Acceptance
Research from The Trevor Project and other studies emphasizes that family rejection can lead to severe consequences for LGBTQ+ youth. These include higher risks of depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, and even homelessness. Conversely, support from family members, particularly siblings, can create a protective environment that nurtures resilience and confidence.
Chazzie’s story is a testament to this. “Our family’s acceptance has given me a sense of belonging that I didn’t know I needed,” she said. “It’s not just about knowing who I am—it’s about being seen, valued, and supported.”
A Message of Hope
For those still searching for allyship in their own lives, Chazzie offers encouragement. “No matter what, there is always hope,” she said. Her own journey has not only transformed her life but also sparked a movement within her family to create a space of inclusivity and positivity. “I recognize our story is not like a lot of my peers,” she added. “I really want to fix that.”
Lev’s understanding of transgender and nonbinary identities has also evolved. “It’s easy to focus on the label,” he said. “But what’s most important is the person behind it. The way they laugh, the way they think, the way they dream. That’s what makes them real.”
Together, the siblings exemplify how familial support can shape a young person’s path. Their story reminds us that acceptance isn’t just a choice—it’s a continuous act of love, curiosity, and connection. As Chazzie and Lev continue to grow, their relationship remains a beacon of what’s possible when families choose to embrace their children’s truths without hesitation.
Looking Ahead
Chazzie’s advocacy through The GenderCool project highlights the importance of storytelling in challenging stereotypes and building bridges. By sharing her journey, she aims to inspire others to see trans and nonbinary youth not as outliers, but as individuals with rich, multifaceted lives. “Our goal is to show that these people are not defined by their identity,” Lev said. “They’re defined by who they are, what they do, and how they live.”
As society continues to evolve, the Grosshandlers’ experience offers a compelling case for the role of siblings in fostering acceptance. Their journey from childhood playmates to steadfast allies illustrates that the support of family can be a cornerstone of resilience, self-discovery, and joy in the LGBTQ+ community.
